happy Sweet 16 to me~OCT29th.

I loved waking up to a million phone calls

+

the ones from midnight already

I loved seeing my friends

without them I wouldn't be happy[trust.me]

I loved finally spending a good day in class

without any hurt or anger

except when the balloons kept bopping me in the head :]

I loved this day indeed.

I hated the end

but those reasons are gonna be left unsaid

today I can say, I was happy for real

Whisper to a scream

Spinning out of my reach
it came down like this
anger in my heart
hurting in my head
its nice to move along
and messed up to
have to deal with this again
its terrible to go on like your happy everyday
when all you want to do is fall
just cry the day away
your friends don't know
your family doesn't either
its inside your head the voices that have no mercy
this is not for pity
its simple self expression
i love the way written words
can put this all together.

For all the promises to bust....

Working so hard

for what I planned

never thought they'd

get it so easy

this heart attack

cant believe I'm sitting

in the sidelines

and your in the show

don't get me wrong

I'm OK

a smile on my face

just so you know

but leave me alone

I cant have this now

lets pretend were all happy

its easier like that

So sick of love songs.

Everyday waking up

oh look at this beautiful morning

sarcasm for breakfast

she don't give a damn

thinking today wasn't like the rest

it was better, yeah

till her heart stopped beating

yeah she knew it

it wouldn't let her be happy

just moving moving

the gears in her

shes trying to figure out

whats gonna happen today

turn the corner

nothing yet

look straight

imagine what would've been

the fights have all stopped

the tears have dried

the anger in her chest

enough to kill them all

but no

hush up

she got nothing to say

under the rain

her faith lower then dirt

whats destiny when you don't want it at all

and I hope you know that she has survived

this day

waiting for the next

she tells God, she don't want it again

My rap. [lyrics by me]

This girl

sitting on her own

wishing she had something anything to call her own

always put down, from all around

keeping her hood on, and her headphones blaring

night and day

crying herself to sleep

she cant figure out

what its all about

why even god wants her to stay alive

her friends watching her fall from grace, its OK

nobody gonna catch her

that's the way huh

satisfaction leave it to the pain to make her feel like something

likes shes so valuable

its OK she knows shes lying

to herself and everybody else too

a smile on the inside like an open wound

leave it to them

to call her out

rock a bye baby and goodnight

its gonna be alright

with nobody there to stop her

shes running out

guitar in one hand

leave the door closed

its fine

you know she ain't coming back

BAM BANG BOOM

I'm so sick and tired

of all this mess we have created

I want you to know

I quit

I'm done for good

with you and this

I don't want it anymore

offers of peace

forget them

my times wasted enough

I still want to cry

but I'm guessing its gonna be for life

we all make mistakes

were all human

I'm just sorry you couldn't see that

we all done something

to each other

we all hurt ourselves

were confused

were scared

were pissed off

ha..welcome to life

you know who you are

the fact is

I'm not using my

voice

I lost it already

I'm using my big heart

which I have finally pieced together

I'm moving along

with my guitar in my hand

down this deserted road

hitching rides from the devil

knocking on the door to hell

Have a good life

you, the person I once called a friend

I don't want this too get worse

so I'll just stop right here

Im just a kid, and life is a nightmare

This world is spinning

I'm not winning

whatever life has out for me

I look at my bruised knees

from all the falling

with nobody there to catch me

I gotta little envy

for the prom queen

I'm sitting in the bleachers alone

I gotta little hatred

for the people who

stepped all over me

without a glance at who I am

its OK for the the people

who don't care whats under their shoe

well my people

I got to tell you

I'm sorry for whatever went on

so I'm here alone

on the bleachers

with no one

writing these words

I'M JUST A KID AND LIFE IS NIGHTMARE